A Confessional

 

 

Father, I see why you feel unfamiliar

And don’t remember ever seeing me here.

Because there are no sins I commit,

Would you believe me? Funny, isn’t it?

Ok I copied quiz from the next seat hottie,

That’s because she was being naughty.

Her answer sheet just came in between,

While it was her cleavage that had me keen.

On his wife’s funeral he misunderstood,

Mr A overheard me telling it for his good,

That how’d he now wish to catch Parkinson,

Wobbly touch to self and job well done.

And Mrs Z was just unjust to be furious,

If on my privy tattoos her girl got curious,

Called me libertine, she crossed boundary

And left me to do but piss on her laundry.

I fell in their room like a heavenly light

Entertaining the two lezzies all night,

Jumped on trampoline, hair on forehead,

Saved them from dying virgin instead.

So Father, assure me of my innocence,

Baptize from what stains my brilliance.

Say again that I’m no culprit of apple bite,

All that happened was twist of fate, right?